Who the hell thought this country would be any good at service industries anyway?

I often find myself (during my more lucid moments at least) wondering why this country decided to concentrate on developing it's economy around tertiary (service) industries when we are just so appallingly fucking bad at them

Actually, it's because Mrs Thatcher closed all the other places down as part of her Scorched Earth policy in the 80's (in which about 1000 northern miners were deemed to be worth the same as a single braying fuckwit in London, barking into a mobile phone the size of a horse's cock. I remember the hideous old crow even went as far to pretty much admit this live on TV once), coupled with the fact that it's a lot easier to buy our clothes from sweatshops and our food from the Third World than to actually produce stuff ourselves (which reminds me, I bought a pair of combats from Primark last week and the button came off. If I ever get hold of the little bastard who made it I'll break the lazy little sods arm. That's £7 I won't see again in a hurry).

In short the idea seemed to be " lets get rid of the people who actually do stuff, then what we'll do is we'll get the most passive/aggressive culture in Europe, steeped in class ridden neuroses for several generations, put them in cheap suits and then send them on a seminar called "How to put up with cunts", run by a twat called Darryl".

During this seminar Darryl explains to you how to communicate by drawing some fucking graphs on a whiteboard. For £450 quid a head. With a shit lunch thrown in, unless you actually like eating tiny little pasties that taste like they are full of sick, whilst smiling inanely at the other idiots there. Anyway, I digress somewhat...

I just can't understand it. everyone involved hates taking part in the whole dreadful charade of customer care, and despite the number of CVs I have read expressing a yearning lifelong desire to "help customers and maintain a high level of service" I have yet to find just 1 person who doesn't curl their lips with distaste (or if they are at least honest, just make horrible spastic faces) when talking about their "clients".

No one ever puts in their CV "Everyone I had contact with in my last job repelled me to such an extent that my very soul would recoil in sheer animal terror and I felt like my life was being torn out through my arsehole every single fucking minute i was there, so I left in the vain but unlikely hope that your shit-tip would be an improvement". I wonder why no one writes that?

Why can't we just be honest and tell people "Look, I personally don't give a toss about what you think about our service, I really don't, because even if you do decide you can be arsed to fuck off and find something else, there will inevitably be another monkey along in a few minutes".

I think it's mainly just the view that we (those of us in the service sector- that's about 90% of the population) have about ourselves that just gets right on my tits. The terrible, presumptuous arrogance that what we do at work is actually, even in some tiny insignificant way, in any way important at all. It just isn't , and never will be, regardless of how much complete bollocks you write on your website about your "Proven Fucking Bespoke Solutions".

You're probably asking "why are you still doing it then Fat Edgar?" to which I really, really must retort "Go fuck yourself. Just go fuck yourself. This isn't what I had in mind at all"