Been away again I’m afraid

Sadly I am now entirely non-bionic.

I have however filled myself on what has been happening in Jeremy Kyle World. Sadly, it appears the decay continues as more and more worthless pieces of genetic detritus get washed up on it’s filthy shores.

How nice would it be to round them all up and get them to work on great civic projects? We could then hold lotteries for the right to be overseers for a few days at a time. I think the world would be a much nicer place to live in if we all occasionally had the right to ride around on horseback whipping malingerers.

I see it as the only solution as the benefit laws quite clearly aren’t going to get any less lax.

In future I would prefer it if all new claimants first had to be summoned to an audience in my oak panelled study where they would stand fidgeting awkwardly whilst I interrogated them as to their circumstances.

Those I found too lazy, disrespectful or undeserving I would have sent to colonies forthwith, whilst those who I felt were worthy would be dismissed (to be fed a nourishing broth of kippers and potatoes in my kitchens, as I am nothing if not a philanthropist) with a curt “Silence! I have heard enough of your idle prattlings! I shall ensure you are added to the rolls for poor relief, now be gone from my sight immediately, I have an appointment with the First Sea Lord of the Admiralty!”

Alas, I feel the administrative burden would become too much for me.

Meanwhile, has any seen the adverts on TV for those cunts who call themselves “Blake”?

Awful turgid nonsense…They look like what might happen if you took genetic material from Aled Jones and Will Carling. Mixed it in a lab, injected it into some chimps and then forgot to cull them. Within a few generations, this is what you would have…

http://www.blakeofficial.com/